I've only been up the Grouse Grind once before, and it was carrying a 25 lb. baby Sophie on my back for part of the way. (Holly carried her the rest of the way, I didn't just give up and leave her by the side of the trail - although I probably would have considered it, had I been up there without Holly...) Anyway, you'd think that my brain would have remembered the pain of it all the first time up, but nooooo... Apparently, the Grouse Grind is similar to childbirth insomuch as your brain immediately wipes all the horrible bits away into forgetful oblivion, and remembers only the good bits. Since I went up there this morning with nothing but excited thoughts of a rousing hike to start the day, I figured I ought to write down the bad bits before my brain edits them out and I decide to go again next week.
It started well, with the usual jockeying for position with the other hikers. Don't want to get stuck behind someone slow, right? Then the sweating began. The sweating, and the asthma. I was pouring water like an overflowing dam, and sucking air like an ancient vacuum cleaner. This went on for 15-20 minutes, and then I reached the 1/4 mark sign. This sign is like a mental kick in the groin. Such a lot of effort has been expended to reach this sign, and then it has the gall to tell you that not only are you only 1/4 of the way up Grouse Mountain, but that from now on, the trail will get dangerous and difficult! Good grief. This is where people were getting lightheaded and considering going back down. Nothing like other people's despair for making it more difficult to go on. Somehow, I sucked back a bit more air and continued on.
The wheezing and puffing continued up to the 1/2 way mark, where I had some water and a rest and let a few more grannies toddle past me. After that, I think I got a second wind, but my ankles started threatening to shatter. Whiny old ankles. They made funny noises up until the 3/4 mark, when it was time for a new affliction - just for a change, my heart felt like it would explode up until the top of the mountain, where it completely failed to do so, and I got that wonderfully triumphant feeling that overwrites all the preceding nonsense. Hooray, the top!
A quick change, a bit more water, and I was ready for the gondola trip back down. The trip down takes about 8 minutes. The trip up took 1 hour, 21 minutes, and 47 seconds. Whew!
P.S. This hike was also (officially) the last wearing of the notorious roller hockey coach shirt that Holly has been trying to get me to throw out for the last decade or so. I believe it's about 17 or 18 years old, and has served me well. But I suppose that when you try to pull a shirt off, and it instead just rips more holes in it, it's time to let it die. Goodbye, awesome shirt. It's been a blast.
3 comments:
Good for you, you're burning up your 101 List! At first, I thought you should include a photo of yourself doing the Grind as proof, but when I saw the photo and the state of your t-shirt, I agreed with your decision to leave it out!
Um, has Dean reached a new height of post-hiking delirium by responding to himself on his own post? Like, good job self. Ha ha ha...
Anyhow. Congrats! Truly I appreciate your pain after that "easy" Finlayson hike.
It's that darn Holly, too careless to notice who she's posting as. (As whom she has posted?)
Anyway, I have no problem with patting myself on the back in the second person. Good job, you! (me)
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